For some reason I have always felt like the outsider, the odd man out, not part of the gig. I know it's not really true but it's how I feel, like I'm looking in at everybody and I'm just not in on it.
Now is even worse since Mary wants me out of the house I miss her and our home. It doesn't seem right to be at this point in life. Everything I thought I ever wanted is just going away and I don't seem to be able to do anything about it. I try to put on a strong face and say I'm OK, well I'm not. So I just go on day to day with no real purpose or joy it just hurts everyday. Sometimes I just want to walk off into the forest and disappear.
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