Letting Go

So it seems that all the things, ideas and people that I've held on to need to be let go. The tighter I hold on to the past the more it isn't right anymore. I realize that I have stopped growing and have lost my confidence in myself and in the way I thought things were supposed to be. When I let the passion and drive and dreams leave me I became an unattractive shell of who I could or should be. This is a classic thought pattern for a guy my age and is a turning point that will define the reality and experience I have into the future. It is my choice or if I abdicate my choice it is still a choice with results that may not please me. So I must chart the path I am to travel into my future. Zero sum thinking, start at nothing and go from there at least in my mind. Reality is that there are responsibilities and ends that need to be tied up so to speak. Then the questions begin and the big one being "who do you want to be?" well only I can answer this. Right this moment I truly don't know the answer or even how to ask myself the right questions.

See Ya Dave

Been a while

OK, OK, OK it has been far too long since I wrote anything as if anyone ever reads it. The past 2 months have had so much activity it's hard to know where to start. Brian and Amanda graduated from college, Amanda and Steve got married, Mary and I are working on living together, we ran the Bay to Breakers, all our tenants in the Chico house are moving out by the first of July. WOW! It's like a waterfall pouring down on my head it is not going to stop all I can do is adjust my position so I won't drown. Life changes that I have ignored and put off are now building up to an explosive point where change is going to happen if I lead or follow or get dragged along. I am ready for it no matter what it is. I would like a little say in how it goes though. This is a reoccurring theme in my writings and I need to pull the trigger and accept the consequences.

Love Ya and See Ya Dave